You are here: Home / Musings

Finding community in unusual places

December 7, 2010 By 5 Comments

I’m participating in a 31-day blogging challenge called reverb10, responding to writing prompts that are designed to elicit reflections on 2010, and hopes for 2011. You can find out more about it here.

Today’s prompt: Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Courage to Lead

One community that rocked my world is a group of leaders who have come together for an 18-month Courage to Lead program. I was attracted to this program out of a desire to learn more about  how to help leaders become more effective and to reclaim my own leadership mojo.

The program was positioned for executives in “serving” professions: there are 13 people in our group: seven physician leaders, three executives of health care organizations, one amazing shoe designer, me, and our wise and talented facilitators Drs. Hanna Sherman and Penny Williamson.

I was attracted to the “serving” angle because I believe that the most effective leaders in ANY industry serve their employees, their customers, and their communities.  What has become clear in our little community is that in order to lead a person must be passionately aligned to a sense of purpose that is meaningful, so meaningful that it compels you to serve and lead.  Finding, or in some cases, reclaiming that professional focus, energy and joy is what this community is about.

At the conclusion of our first four-day, long weekend session on Cape Cod, the words “profound,” “counter-cultural,” and”powerful” permeated our conversation.

I’m grateful to this community for their selflessness and generosity. Of course we know how to party, too.  Can’t wait to see how our professional journeys will deepen as we as a community help each other help ourselves.

The speed writing community

Last spring I joined an online writers group where every morning for 28 days  we’d get a prompt, write our story in 10 minutes or less, share with the group online, and read and comment on our fellow — and anonymous — writing members’ stories. (We were loosely connected as most of us had taken writing workshops from the incredible Ann Randolph.)

The stories floored me because they were so honest, real, insightful, funny, tragic, questioning, mysterious and sometimes blunt.

Even better than the treat of  reading these strangers’ stories was the helpful, non-judgmental comments everyone so generously offered to one another. Our community had two simple guidelines for giving feedback:

1. What did you enjoy?

2. What would you like to read more about?

I looked forward to every one of those 28 days of stories.  I hope to find a way to be part of a similar writers’ group next year. It was so much fun.

Filed Under: Communities, Leadership, Musings Tagged With: , , , , ,

Making a little book

December 6, 2010 By 1 Comment

I’m participating in a 31-day blogging challenge called reverb10, responding to writing prompts that are designed to elicit reflections on 2010, and hopes for 2011. You can find out more about it here.

Today’s Prompt: Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

This year I made a little 126-page book, Be the Noodle: 50 Ways to Be a Courageous, Compassionate, Crazy-Good Caregiver, with stories and lessons on helping someone you love die.  I used the emails and blog posts I use to write at night while living with my mother during the last three months of her life. I use to write these to keep my family updated on my mother’s health.  Writing also helped me stay sane and calm.

I love the book cover, designed by the brilliant and generous Stress Limit Design up in Montreal.

What I am most grateful for are the emails from readers who have found comfort, courage and peace from connecting with another family’s story.

My favorite emails were from  a family down South. I first heard from the  college student whose father was dying, who read the book and gave it to her mother. Then I heard the mother’s story a few months later.

The young woman wrote:

“I read “Be the Noodle” and immediately started to feel better. It’s just such a unique book, because it is the only one I’ve come across that feels REAL It isn’t preachy or full of cheesy metaphors comparing tears to oceans or grief to stormy skies. It’s perfect. It actually is SO CLOSE to my mother’s care-giving experience that its creepy. Thank you so much for at least temporarily allowing me to get a little of my peace of mind back. I don’t doubt that ill have another wallowing slump, and another, and then another, and then I’ll be fine, and then I’ll wallow again, etc. but for today, I feel better.”

Then this email came from the young woman’s mother who told me the book helped her make her daughter part of the final weeks with  her father.

“Thank you for your book, it has been a wonderful blessing. I had no intention of sharing with my daughter or her brother those last 15 days, when my husband’s dying process had begun. My husband and I did not want those memories to be our children’s last memories of their father.

“But when my daughter read the book and told me about it, it allowed me to share with her the most agonizing, poignant, intimate, and life-changing experience of my life. Thanks to the book I could share that most intimate experience.

“I have been invited to the Oncology Dept. of our local hospital’s Patient Advocate Council’s next meeting. I plan to attend and hopefully be of some help to families as they ride the roller coaster and begin their journeys as caregivers. I plan to buy many copies of “Be the Noodle” and try to ‘pay it forward’ just as your family as done.

“Thank you for helping me remember my husband’s final days as his caregiver not as agony and heartbreak, but as “the most courageous, inspiring and rewarding job that I never wanted.”

Unlike my professional writing where I write from my head. I wrote this book from my heart. It’s the thing I’m most proud of having made in 2010.

PS:  The Noodle is a metaphor for those styrafoam swimming noodles; we caregivers were my mother’s noodle that she had to hang onto, even though as a swimmer she hated swimming noodles.

PPS: more stories from readers can be found here.

Filed Under: Books, Musings Tagged With: , , , ,

Letting go: goodbye to Beeline Labs

December 5, 2010 By 1 Comment

I’m participating in a 31-day blogging challenge called reverb10, responding to writing prompts that are designed to elicit reflections on 2010, and hopes for 2011. You can find out more about it here.

Today’s challenge: Let go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

This year I got clear on my professional passions, even having the courage to call my professional skills gifts that shouldn’t be overlooked.

With this clarity came the realization that I had to let go of my  Beeline Labs business partners, the incredibly talented Hylton Jolliffe and Francois Gossieaux. And I had to walk away from Beeline Labs, a two year-old marketing innovation firm, which had earned a good reputation, especially in the area of social business strategy.

It was hard to walk away. But I felt staying would be unfair to me and to my friends/partners. Emotions are contagious. When passions are misaligned, people get cranky and disengaged. And this feeling spreads to team members and sometimes even clients.

So we split, and in doing so I let go of all the pressures and responsibilities of growing and managing a firm. Scaling big wasn’t a meaningful enough goal for me. I threw away the desire  to be well known in marketing circles. I  threw the concept of “personal branding” out the window and into my pond.

I stopped listening to people who advised me to write another book, get back on the speaking circuit, stay focused on social media because now’s the time to make some serious money, build a firm with equity and shoot to be acquired. I let go of worrying about how to “position” myself and instead thought more about how to provide more value to my clients. I let go of forecasting and calculating how the work I love will result in financial gain.

I feel much lighter, almost like I could fly.

Filed Under: Activating change, Musings Tagged With: , , ,

Passion and courage: a talk on leadership

November 3, 2010 By 1 Comment

Tonight I’m speaking at a small liberal arts college in Massachusetts about leadership.  But this morning I threw my speech away. During the night I realized that there are no prescribed ways to be a leader. No best practices, methodologies, degrees, optimal career paths to follow.

To me leadership is understanding what one’s own passion is and having the courage to act on it. I’ve met a lot of people  with a lot of passion, but they’ve never allowed themselves to pursue it. And for the first 20 years of my career, neither did I.

I’ve always been torn between the fear of not making enough money  and the joy of pursuing work I love in the environment I love.

By making more decisions based on passion  than fear I am leading my life. Yet the paradox of fear and joy remains.  Most days I have the courage to choose passion, but sometimes not.  My hunch is that this is a constant dilemma most leaders wrestle with.  In my experience making decisions for passion has always resulted in more valuable outcomes than those decisions made by fear — fear of failure,  being criticized, losing a potential contract, etc.

So point one tonight will be  that the balance between fear and passion may never go away, but with some courage we can make more choices for passion.

I think I’ll also lead the college students through a couple of exercises to get them thinking, helping them to help themselves.  Because I’m such a practical person, I’m going to  share simple things  I do to lean into passion:

  • Do one scary thing a year: Every year I take a workshop, commit to a speech, or take on a project that seems way beyond my capabilities.   This “stretch” learning is like staying in shape so you’re able to run a 10K or even a marathon.
  • Walk away: when I’m stuck or frustrated, I walk. I get our of my office and walk and clear my head. Sometimes I sneak to a 10:30 a.m. movie.  Stepping away helps me come back and see the situation in a new way
  • Laugh and be silly: There’s something intoxicating about being silly. It connects me with who I am, and moves me closer to passion and further from fear and doubt.  After a long day at work my son puts the “Talking Carl” iPhone app in my face and I crack up laughing. This silliness is a great energizer. And when you have energy you’re better able to make difficult choices.
  • Say yes to curiosity: When something interests me, I say “yes” to it. Whether it’s reading a book, going to a conference, meeting with a new person.
  • Be positive: positive emotions are contagious, and being around positive people helps people be more open-minded, creative, and healthy.
  • Be frugal:  Not over-extending myself financially has helped reduce my worries about money and given me more choices professionally.  “Why are you still driving Honda’s?” a former colleague asked me. “You should be driving an Audi or BMW to convey what a successful consultant you are,” he advised.  I guess I’m just not afraid of judgments people may make based on what I drive.  My passion is having money saved so that I can go do the next that attracts my passion even if I’m not sure if it will be a financial home run.

Best of all, I get to learn from these students tonight.

Filed Under: Activating change, Leadership, Musings Tagged With: ,

The experiment is working

July 21, 2010 By 1 Comment

A few months ago I read a book by leadership consultant Margaret Wheatley — Turning to One Another –  in which she suggests an experiment:

Be brave enough to start a conversation that matters.

  • Talk to people you don’t know.
  • Talk to people you never talk to.

Be intrigued by the differences you hear.

  • Expect to be surprised.
  • Treasure curiosity more than certainty.

Trust that meaningful conversations can change the world.

When traveling on planes and trains I’m usually head down, checking email, writing strategy documents, catching up on business reading. But for the past few months I’ve intentionally engaged in conversations with strangers, following Wheatley’s advice. And what a few months it has been, from  learning, meaning and networking perspectives.

I had an amazing three hour conversation with a Hollywood producer on a train, where we talked about business models, managing talent, fantasy jobs outside our current fields, packing tips for traveling, creative and challenging things we do for our own professional development, fear of aging, sisters, and books and movies.  I learned that executives in any business have the same issues — cash flow, talent, customer satisfaction — and that executives in any business are people with hopes and fears, aspirations and restlessness.

A kind, gentle woman from Louisiana talked to me about her faith, and how being born again with Jesus has made her life one of serenity and comfort.  She gave me a Bible and pointed out passages that someone who has never read the Bible might like.  I asked her why a compassionate Jesus would discriminate against gays, as her Church does. She hesitated and carefully considered the question. “Maybe we need to rethink things there.”

A rollicking Amtrak conversation with a biomedical engineer who designs heart replacements and an executive coach and documentary company executive was all about bad decisions and lessons learned — managing real estate property and tenant problems,  marriage –  knowing when it’s time to change career directions, and the surprising kindness of strangers.

The African American documentary director shared the story of how a member of the Seagram’s family changed her family’s history. Her father was a shoeshine boy at a country club in St. Louis. One of the Seagram’s got to know her father and said, “Henry, you seem like a smart young man. Why are you shining shoes?”  Her father said he didn’t have the money to go to college. The Seagram’s founder gave her father the money to go to medical school, with one stipulation: he had to pay back every cent, which he did.

So this is a summer of surprise, and conversations that matter.  Look up from your reading and be curious. These  real life stories are better than anything in the 20 books waiting to be read on my Kindle.

Filed Under: Communicating, Musings Tagged With: , , , , ,

The music factor

July 6, 2010 By Leave a Comment

There’s a piano art installation in New York City — Sing for Hope –  where 60 pianos are on street corners and in city parks, inviting people to sit and play. The stories of how people are lured to the possibility of  the pianos, and then sitting down and playing their favorite piece, some basics like “Chopsticks,” some Broadway hits, and some serious classical works.

Imagine if companies were to do a similar installation. Maybe around strategic planning time? Or the end of the fiscal year when the tension is stultifying?  The image of what might be possible in a different approach to employee engagement makes me smile thinking about the possibilities.

I shared this thought over at The Employee Engagement Community and  one of the community members from London shared this story about a similar piano installation and how the public piano was for a employee motivation and determination lesson.

Funnily enough, I was on an away-day last week with a great ‘facilitator’, and we learned to sing a song (in three groups) that worked in the round. Once we had come together and sang it once, the facilitator said, “right, that’s good enough. Now let’s go to Liverpool Street station, and do it in public”. Argh!

All but two of us went with it, and we found one of these pianos tethered to the station entrance (there’s a similar installation in London, currently). So we struck up an impromptu performance, caused a lot of smiles, and went back to the session, 30 minutes after we were first shown the music, realising what we can accomplish together in a very small space of time, with the right spirit of commitment. Very strong experience, despite the ‘happy clappy’ factor.

Filed Under: Activating change, Musings

Research: women in male fields not seen as competent, likable

June 8, 2010 By Leave a Comment

I’m writing a rather important speech for an executive to give in Washington, D.C. next week about women in innovation and came across this rather alarming piece of research by Madeline Heilman, professor or organizational development at New York University.

The study found that:

  • People viewed women in male-type occupations as less competent than men, unless there is concrete, visible performance information to prove otherwise.
  • When evidence showed that the women were as successful and competent as the men, they faced another challenge: people said the women were unlikable. People like men more than women in male-dominated fields like engineering.
  • Both competence and likability play a role in workplace success and career advancement. So women in science and technology fields have a double whammy to overcome: prove they know their stuff and overcome biases that they are cold, pushy, unfeeling and generally unlikable.

Other research has found that women in the STEM fields (science, technology, engineering, math) drop out of their fields mid-career, about 10 years into it. No wonder, with such ingrained biases among both men and women. Who wants to get up and go to work in that environment?

Heilman’s research also found that when people were told that the woman demonstrated “communal” behavior, e.g.,  she encourages cooperation and fosters a sense of belonging for her employees, people began liking her.  Similarly if people learned the woman was a mother, they liked her more.

Women have made progress, but not enough. The guys may have unfounded biases about women in these male-dominated fields, but we working women should know better, and be open and supportive of women who are still breaking the glass ceiling and lab walls.

Filed Under: Activating change, Innovation, Musings, Research Tagged With: , ,

Things I've been noticing

May 27, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Every quarter, or change of season, I reflect on things I’ve been noticing and ponder what they may mean.   Here are some  slow trends and emerging patterns I’ve been noticing, and my thoughts on what they might mean.

2500 people sign up for a “spirituality-based” marketing teleseminar at 8 p.m. on a Wed. night

Here’s more evidence that people are hungry for meaning and purpose in their professions and business. I saw that more than 2,500 people dialed in for a conference call about how to run a spirituality-driven business. Nothing about religion. But doing work that feeds your soul. Holy cow.   This trend should send a signal to leaders in business:  is it high time to step back and refresh and reframe your organization’s purpose so people see that it matters? And what they do matters to this purpose?  I saw a recent study that showed a significant disconnect between executives saying that their company’s purpose was clear and employees saying that they had no  idea of the company’s purpose.

John Seely Brown and John Hagel recently published a Change This Manifesto where they declared: “All too often those who are passionate about their work are frustrated with their employers and bosses. They are not satisfied. Far from it. They want to do more, but they feel held back.”  Are you inadvertently holding your people back?

I’ve also talked with several corporate executives who think they should leave big companies and do something else. Maybe. But it might be that they just need to reset the context of their organizations and position to get recharged.  We need great leaders and  successful companies now more than ever.

World of Warcraft: teaching leadership and collaboration skills

Like many parents of teenagers I get crazy seeing how much time my son spends playing World of Warcraft. But over dinner with a bunch of teenagers, I started to see that this game may actually be a powerful way for people to learn collaboration and leadership skills. My son’s guild leader is a leader. In fact, he recently started footing the bill for Oovoo, a video conferencing and chat program, so that the guild members could work more closely together as a team. I listen in some nights and I hear these kids helping one another, with a shared purpose and genuine collaboration.

I believe that multi-player game applications have tremendous potential in the corporate world. Interestingly, the American Society of Training & Development recently wrote an article about the parallels between games and business team building –  solving problems together, being presented with harder and harder challenges, getting recognition, etc.  Worried about how to engage GenY, think games.

New questions: why does the world need your business now?

The people who are asking new questions — provocative but simple questions — are changing and realizing their goals faster.  Every year when I go to the BIF innovation conference, I am stunned at the powerful questions that these innovators in business, science, education and the arts ask themselves and their organizations.

I was having lunch with author and psychologist Maria Sirois recently and we got to talking about a new non-profit being organized by a major university. “Why does the world need this organization now,”  she asked.  WOW. What a question. Recently I’ve been helping clients reclaim their purpose and passion by asking them the same question. “Why does the world need your business/product now?” “Why does your corporate especially need your organization now?”  This question helps you make meaning — why you’re so relevant, why you matter.

Another question I recently heard that opens up thinking: “Are we giving ourselves titles that demand fearlessness and innovation?”  If you had to put your senior vice president of marketing or  director of sales title aside, what would call yourself?   Mine would probably be chief possibility officer.  John Seely Brown, former chief scientist at Xerox and visiting scholar at USC, calls himself “chief of confusion,” helping people to ask new questions.

Not for everyone: consultants rejoining corporations and agencies

Every day I see Tweets and blog posts about consultants leaving to join companies and agencies.  It’s not really surprising.  Running a consulting business, as I have for 15 years, isn’t for everyone. You have to be focused on helping your clients succeed. Period. It’s not about your big ideas or your “personal brand” (oh, puhleeze), but about passionately wanting to improve clients’ conditions.   And, of course, it’s all about execution, hard work, discipline, deepening and developing relationships, and relentless follow through.  Consulting is not for everyone. But for those of us who consciously or unconsciously practice servant leadership, it can be incredibly rewarding.

Where are the new ideas? What are we missing?

There’s a deep restlessness in business.  People want fresh ideas — new ways to market, better ways to shorten sales cycles, ideas that attract and influence prospects. This restlessness is a good thing as it drives people to innovate. The downside I see is that the relationship between companies and their agencies (advertising, PR, digital) is not what it use to be. The trust and loytalty is tenuous, and the relationships are often short lived because companies say that they’re “just not getting new ideas.”

I’ve counseled many a client recently about NOT firing its agency. Especially for this reason.  Instead  I believe clients and agencies need to spend the time doing offsite ideation and relationship retreats at least once a year, facilitated by an independent party.

I also believe managers need to do this with their employees to recharge, uncover ideas,reset purpose, and address those  burning question: What are we missing? What new ideas could make a difference to what we’re trying to achieve?

Pattern watching as business competence

How to build trend spotting and ideas into your organization? Consider  having your team hold a “Things I’m Observing” lunch every quarter.  This helps everyone on the team become more observant and bring new ideas into the organization. In addition to sharing ideas, ask people to share their  interesting sources — off the beaten track bloggers, communities, foreign films, books, niche publications, unusual friends.  Developing a competency to bring emerging trends into the organization and discuss what they might mean is becoming more important than ever for anyone in a leadership, sales or marketing position,

(NOTE: I’ll soon be sharing my plans on a new business that helps clients in many of the ideas discussed above.  Leadership, marketing and sales run on purpose and passion, but many companies need help to see possibilities among the relentless day-to-day business demands.


Filed Under: Activating change, Innovation, Leadership, Musings, Sales Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Risky success stories: passion for what you know is good

April 22, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Next to Normaljpeg

What a week it’s been with stories of “underdogs” succeeding.

“Too risky” is what most backers, advisers and producers said to Paul Harding, winner of the Pulitzer Prize for his brilliant novel Tinkers; to the producers of “Next To Normal,” the riveting Broadway play about mental illness that also won a Pulitzer this year for Drama, to Lissa Boles, who moved from marketing executive to founder of The Soul Map, a unique consulting service that helping people create purposeful life plans based on astrology.

Then I finally meet Mike Strozier, founder of World Audience Publishers, an independent publishing company for and by artists,  that is small but growing fast. Even though people are saying publishing is over, Mike is succeeding because  he loves art, loves writers, and is a gentle, generous soul with a quiet but intense passion.

Mainstream publishers turned down my book “Be the Noodle” because it was, you got it, too risky.  “It should be a memoir or a how-to book,” the fraidy cats told my agent Neil Salkind, “a love story or an adventure guide. But  not all of those things.”   Yet Neil found Mike, and now the book is finding an audience and touching people in a way that just fills me with joy and gratitude.

Passion can trump risk. The trick, I’ve found, is to persevere when in your heart of hearts you know you’ve done some good work that can serve others.

In the Sunday New York Times story, “Mr. Cinderella: From Rejection Notes to the Pulitzer,” Paul Harding’s friend and former teacher Marilynne Robinson, author of Gilead, said, “One of the problems I have is making my students believe that they can write something that satisfies their definition of good, and they don’t have to calculate the market.” Ah, wise woman advice.

Though we’re taught in business school to calculate the market opportunity and then fill a need, perhaps that advice stunts too many innovators, artists, passionate entrepreneurs.

As Robinson advises, maybe we should satisfy our own definition of good.

Filed Under: Activating change, Communicating, Musings

Let out your creative beast

March 24, 2010 By Leave a Comment
Let Out the Creative Beast

Filed Under: Activating change, Innovation, Musings

My first Pecha Kucha experience

March 11, 2010 By Leave a Comment

Maybe you’ve heard of the growing Pecha Kucha happenings all over the world, where people in a city come together for a night of sharing stories. Each “presenter” has 20 slides, 20 seconds per slide to talk about that night’s theme.

I had read about Pecha Kucha, pronounced “pecca-CHOCK- chaaaaa” and last night experienced it in Providence, where almost 100 people turned out to hear 9 speakers, including me.

Some of my observations and thoughts:

  1. Other  views: I especially liked hearing people with points of views very different from mine.  The vibe at a Pecha Kucha Night is open, friendly, accepting.  People don’t rant; they share their perspectives, some really passionate.  I learned a lot about why people hold some views they do, though I still may not agree with them.  Michael Bass of Ocean State Action, presented data to  support his view that the wealthy should be taxed more so that the state can support public structures and initiatives.  As someone who sees the job-creating and revenue value of making a state more business friendly, I probably want ever be supporter of Michael’s organization, but I really valued his critical thinking, genuine values and passion.  Takeaway? It’s good to get out and hear from people you ordinarily would never mix with; it made me see into my state with a new lens. While I wish
  2. You do what?: who knew that there are so many interesting, niche ways that people earn a living, like Michael Born who talked about his profession as an architectural illustrator
  3. Stories vs. information: Sharing a personal story is always more compelling than  presenting data and information about a topic. You can tell who cares: this format unveils people’s passion — or lack of — about a topic. Sculptor Gillian Christy told the fascinating story of the highlights of creating and installing her new “Making Waves” sculpture in Providence. You could feel her love and her passion. And she knew how to share details with us that brought the story alive, like making sure all 700 rivets were aligned. Wow.
  4. People just want to have some fun: John Speck kicked off the evening, leading us all through a hilarious group song intended to help us learn how to pronounce Pecha Kucha. And I believe he succeeded brilliantly.
  5. Courage and personal stories:  When I speak I usually try to educate in an engaging way. Last night I tried out a whole new style, sharing three personal stories that changed my business, changed my career and changed my life. It’s scary to open up that way, especially to a roomful of strangers.  Not sure yet what folks thought, but I’m committed to trying out new ways of communicating and connecting with people, for my own growth and to be a better adviser to my clients.  Research tells us that the personal stories move people emotionally, and emotion is the trigger for understanding and action. But publicly sharing stories that rocked our world takes a whole lot of courage.

Part of Pecha Kucha is also “networking,” which this introvert really hates doing. Maybe there should be a table set aside for introverts, so we can quietly talk and respectfully listen.

Thanks to the wonderful and multi-talented Stephanie Gerson, a San Fran transplant to RI who is the mastermind behind Pecha Kucha Providence.

Filed Under: Communicating, Language, Musings Tagged With: , ,

Sisters, Raise Your Hands

January 20, 2010 By 1 Comment

GirlRaisingHand

Sisters, raise your hands and stand up for how good you are.  Otherwise no one will notice you, especially in this age where “personal branding” is so powerful and, perhaps, necessary for career growth.

Clay Shirky, of New York University and author of my favorite social media book “Here Comes Everybody,” writes a thought provoking rant on his blog this week aptly titled “A Rant About Women.”

Shirky’s point is that talented women are often overlooked by less competent men because we women don’t know how to raise our hands and say how good we are. Without being assertive and advancing our own cause, we get overlooked. Way too many of the male “arrogant self-aggrandizing jerks” (Shirky’s words)  get the book contracts, the promotions, the funding, the keynote speaking slots.

However, even in an ideal future, self-promotion will be a skill that produces disproportionate rewards, and if skill at self-promotion remains disproportionately male, those rewards will as well. This isn’t because of oppression, it’s because of freedom.

When I speak at conferences I’m usually the only woman. When I look at my library of professional books I see almost all male authors. When I look at annual reports the faces are male. It’s not that women aren’t as competent, it’s just that we find it distasteful to be self-promoters. Yesterday I saw  tweets from a former male colleague: “My book’s still selling big.”  “I’m on another best seller list.” Oh puhleeze, I thought. But the fact is that he is on the best seller list even though the book is only so-so.

Sisters, it’s time to put ourselves out there more and not worry about failing publicly. It doesn’t hurt that much (believe me!) and you still make a giant step compared to the baby steps when you’re invisible. Let’s stop  worrying what people might say about us. (Chances are it will be good anyway.) We have to become much more comfortable with tooting our own horns ’cause no one else is going to do it. Raise your hand and say “I can do that.”

This is road to advancement.

If you’re ever worried or hesitant about taking a chance, reach out to me and I’ll give you a boost.  Or follow Valeria Maltoni, a brilliant marketer who is generous in helping other women and also recognizes that women need to raise their hands more often.

Let’s show the world that you can advance your career by standing up and stepping out — without a trace of the arrogant jerk.

Filed Under: Activating change, Communicating, Musings Tagged With: , , , , ,

The upside of getting laid off from ad agencies

December 3, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Here’s the trailer from the new documentary “Lemonade” about how six ad agency veterans found new lives and passions after getting laid off.  I never got laid off from an agency, but 12 years ago I did walk away from my position as president of  an  agency  because the juice just wasn’t there for me.  It was a great decision, opening paths to interesting work and opportunities.

Every year about this time I ask my self three questions, which help me stay connected to meaningful work. The more connected I am, the more valuable the work is for clients. And, mostly importantly, the happier I am.

1. What do I love most about my work?

2. What do I love least?

3. A year from now what will I look back on and feel proud about having done in my work?

Good luck on your journey. Better to keep asking these questions than be “surprised” by a pink slip.

Filed Under: Activating change, Advertising, Musings Tagged With: , , ,

The 10 forgotten marketing & communications skills

December 2, 2009 By Leave a Comment

Hedge

Business is communications, not the use of devices or channels, as important as they are. Here are 10 skills of the best leaders and marketers, often forgotten when hiring internal resources or outside consultants and agencies.

  1. Move over James Lipton: conducting interviews that uncover interesting, entertaining and enlightening ideas
  2. Texas girls do it best: politely hijacking the conversation, steering it to where you want it to go while making others feel really good about where you’re taking it. (My hypothesis is that Texas women excel at this.)
  3. Tackling the taboos: provoking healthy debate on “off limit” issues that need to be addressed, especially to overcome obstacles
  4. I believe!: performing vs. presenting in order to open minds and help people see the possibilities
  5. YouTube tribal chant: telling stories with video moves people rationally and emotionally, but too many of us have been exclusively trained in words
  6. Change the context, win the game: resetting context to help people see a situation through a different lens. One of the most powerful selling strategies.
  7. Reading between the lines: extracting meaning from what’s being talked about, in person and amid the millions of online/mobile “conversations”
  8. Mind your manners: practicing small kindnesses that make a big difference in getting great work done and  attracting people with well directed energy and talent
  9. The Jon Stewart revolution: creating stories that people love to share
  10. The innovator’s real dilemma: asking questions that get to the “aha”

Filed Under: Communicating, Musings Tagged With: ,

Marketing tips for resort retailers

September 29, 2009 By Leave a Comment

NewportJPEG

Yesterday was one of those precious few Sept. New England days where the sun is bright and the temperature balmy. So at lunch I skipped out of the office and went to  Newport, RI for a walk on the beach and a tour of the shops.

The beach was great and Newport’s downtown was jammed because a huge Bermuda-bound cruise ship was stuck in the harbor, forced to stick around due to impending bad weather. What a boon for retailers, who have had a poor sales season due to the rainy, cool summer.  Yet I  think some  of these retailers may be struggling for other reasons.

Here are some observations and marketing advice for retailers at a resort location like Newport:

Be open: many shops were dark, with ‘closed for Monday and Tuesday’ signs on the doors.  When the weather is good and a cruise ship with thousands of people are in town,  open the doors and make some money. Cash flow is king. In another six weeks the tourist traffic is going to dry up. Catch up on your rest then.

Be different: so many stores looked the same, carrying similar merchandise, having similar looks and feels. The bland and blander tourist tee shirt storefronts,  hippy clothing stores and   pizza shops made it easy for me to just skip past them. One store caught my attention because of its name, “Gossip: a boutique to talk about.”  Alas, it was closed on Mondays and Tuesdays.  Stand outs, however were Tyler Boe, with a unique collection of cashmere-cotton sweaters in unique colors. But Tyler Boe has no web site.  I want to  give some positive word of mouth marketing but the store makes it hard for me to do so. No Web site is being different, but not a smart marketing strategy.

Be interested: one of the biggest challenges for any retailer is staff. Too many stores had help that looked  bored  to death, probably lamenting the departure of their hip friends and cool summer people, left to wait on cruise ship patrons whose taste looked more J.C. Penney than J. Crew.  Disinterested staff dampens the shopping vibe. Perhaps it’s wiser for owners to work the floor more themselves  or pay more to get better help.

Be helpful:  conversely the stores with friendly, helpful people were great shopping experiences that earned my word of mouth recommendations. I walked into Sovereign Bank to ask for change so I could feed the parking meter. I fully expected them to say they didn’t do that, as I had already seen signs in stores saying this. Instead, the teller was delightful and gave me my quarters and a few insider tips about what’s going on in Newport. I might even change my bank account if that’s what every Sovereign branch is like. Similarly the owner of RoyalMale on Bannister Wharf and Spring St. was an example of superb customer service, providing suggestions, pulling out sweaters not on the floor that she thought might look good on me. No wonder that the store was doing a brisk business  even though the items had a relatively high price point.

Be ready: Running a retail business in a resort is unpredictable, but that’s no reason not to be ready to take advantage of happy surprises, like a cruise ship pumping thousands of people through the town on a typically “off” day.  Have a back up plan to get more help into your store when lucky breaks happen. The Rockport shop on Thames street was jammed, but staffed by just one person.  What a shame to see people come in and leave empty handed because they couldn’t get help.

Filed Under: Dumb company stories, Musings, Sales, Smart company stories, Word of mouth Tagged With: , , , , , , ,
« Older Posts
Newer Posts »